Value In Music

          After high school we embark on this journey of trying to figure out who we are and what work we will choose that will define a majority of our adult life. For some it may be what you were in high school i.e. a jock or a musician… others may choose medicine because they are smart or love the topic… others may pursue financially stable careers while others will pursue something they love. However, I view being a musician as something more of a disease than a career choice. Most people I know are musicians because they HAVE to be not because they have chosen it. I’m actually quite convinced that being a musician is in the same family of disorders as OCD. (I do not mean to make light of ODC just merely drawing a comparison between a musicians need to create, practice, and perform… and someone that does something obsessively.)

            So for me… I’ve chosen the life of an artist. However I do reject the regular stigma that encapsulates an artist’s life… like the whole “I’m going to be broke my whole life”… and “I rather be poor making my art than selling out”…. Or whatever other cliché rationalization that people throw around to cement their failure in other people’s minds so when said artist does succeed everyone around him/her is pleasantly surprised.

            Enough of my rambling…. On to the little black book in CaLM called “Art/Fear”.

In chapter III the author David Bayles & Ted Orland discuss the fears we have about ourselves. Instead if diving into crazy hypothetical’s I’m just going to write about something that stuck with me that pertain to this topic.

            So many times as a musician I ask myself “Why am I doing this? Isn’t there something I could be doing that would make a difference in this world?” All too often I question myself extensively about what I’m doing. I see doctors working on cures to better humanity or soldier’s proudly serving their country and I feel as though my pursuits pail in comparison…. Almost as if my pursuit of art is a selfish indulgence that is laughable in the grand scheme of humanity.

            However I once read an article by a famous piano player that was discussing this same topic. He was a well known teacher working in New York. Everything was going well until he witnessed the events of September 11^th, 2001. I’m paraphrasing but he basically went on to say that he did not touch the piano for days as he looked back on his life and felt guilty of all the time he spent doing something perceived as meaningless based on recent events. He witnessed fire fighters giving their lives for the greater good and what was he doing…. Playing music.

            It wasn’t until he went out into the city a few days later he realized the importance of music. People had gathered together and were singing. It was then that he realized that when people reach down into their most basic human instincts and source of coping and communicating music is what they found. In the midst of complete destruction music brought humanity together…. When no words were left to comfort the grieving music comforted their hearts and minds…. Music is water to our souls.

            Whenever I question why I’m doing what I’m doing or feel that it doesn’t compare to someone in a more prestigious profess I just remember this story and it brings peace to my musical pursuits.

Chris